I’m so sorry it took so long to post this episode. This Sallah break has been one helluva stressful period. I hope you guys enjoy this episode as much as I do.
I was raped by someone whom I thought loved me, someone who promised me heaven on earth and others. I couldn’t think straight, all I could think of was what I did to deserve it. Why did he have to rape me? He could have asked; not that if he did, I’d let him. The deed was done and there was nothing to be done; no one needs to know about this, I’d keep it a secret.
The bastard was living his life as though nothing happened. He changed my mindset about guys, turned me into the monster I have grown to accept and love. Yes, I am a monster and I’m proud. I can’t be hurt and I won’t be hurt the way I’m hurting right now; I WAS GOING TO REVENGE AND I DON’T CARE HOW. It took me a long time before I could put my plans into motion.
I won’t say all men are scum ‘cos I still had one that treated me like A queen but that didn’t mean I was ready to give myself to any guy yet. I was going to let him do all he wants for me without asking for anything.
Back in the hostel, My room mates noticed I was feeling down and were asking questions. “Babe, what’s up with you? Are you sure you’re okay?” Rachel asked.
“I noticed this too oh. She hasn’t even been on the phone as much as she used to and it all started since she got back from her outing last night.” Tolu said .
“Babes, I’m fine.. I just want to be alone right now.” I said as I left the room walking out without having a destination in mind; I just walked to where my feet could take me.
I was listening to my favorite song, 2012 by Jay Sean and kicking the stones on my path as I walked; I’m always listening to music and taking long walks when I need to clear my head.
My walk led me to lagoon front where I saw different lovers all loved up and enjoying each other’s company; made me wish I had someone to call my own. I was so lost in my thoughts I didn’t hear someone behind me.
“Hi, I saw you staring at the water so deep in thought, hope you’re okay?”
I stared at him and kept quiet; I didn’t know what to say and I wasn’t gonna open up to a stranger. I’d rather hurt in silence than let anyone hear my problems again.